Photo by Lillian Soup. Taken from Unsplash.com
Photo by Lillian Soup. Taken from Unsplash.com




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Ramadan is a month of more. More time for Him. More time to pray. More time for family. More time for others. More time for the unfortunates. More time for ourselves. More time to remember things. More time to forget things. Quieter. More tolerance. More food. More blessings. More loving. More sharing.

Ramadan is a month of less. Less time to sleep. Less time to eat. Less concentration. Less awake. Less emotion. Less grudge. Less spending. Less extravagant. Less noise. Less intolerance.

Ramadan is a month of blessings. More focused working hours due to no break. Coming home early. The array of various snacks, some sold annually, here and there. Warm food for iftar. Small bites and water running down the throat after a day full of fasting. Incredible. Marvelous. Thankful.

Ramadan is a month of struggle. Of trying to wake up early enough. Bleary-eyed, uncoordinated, incoherent. Trying to stuff as many foods as possible. No coffee for a month. Dragging self to work two hours early. Struggling to stay awake once the clock hits noon. Still falling asleep. Too lazy to do everything. Trying to hold up the emotions. Good emotions. Bad emotions. No gossip for a month. No dirty thoughts. No cursing in the head. Nothing should be too much. Taking longer and deeper breaths. Hard. Little sufferings. Torture.

Ramadan is a month of respect. Respect ourselves who fast. Respect others who fast. Respect others who not fast. Respect the body. Respect the soul. By being mindful of what we eat, what we drink, what we say, what we see. Respect. Mindful. Because fasting is what we give and give. Never what we take and take.

Ramadan is a month of wake up call. To stay quiet and focused. Don't let anything ruin your fast. To constantly be thankful for everything. To constantly be grateful for everything. To take things slower. To do things more efficiently. To never let little inconvenience disturb you. Zen. Calm. To not eat too much more than what you can take. To eat mindfully. To eat healthily. To eat accordingly. To sleep early for even earlier suhur. Alert. Awake.

Ramadan is a month of regret. Regret for eating too much while another sister is in hunger. Regret for eating more than my tummy can take. The regret of throwing rotten leftover food left for the sake of "I'll eat it later!". Oh, who am I lying to? Regret for saying bad things that disturb my fasting. Regret because unable to withhold my emotions. The regret of awake for too long. Regret for falling asleep for too long. Shameful. Why, self?

Ramadan is a month of sharing. With the unfortunates. With the close ones. With the loved ones. Making sure no one lacks food albeit not much. Making sure no one sleeps in hunger. Making sure everyone who fast could break it conveniently. Share the food. Share the joy. Share the love. Share the blessings.

Ramadan is a month of getting closer. To God. To loved ones. To close ones. To the old friends. To new friends. To those people we rarely contact with. Gather together. Iftar together. Bonding over food and desserts. Endless chat and laughter after. Praying together. Catch up and share goals with each other. Togetherness. Gather. As if time never truly passed.

Ramadan is bittersweet. A month of mixed up feelings. I am grateful to be able to experience another Ramadan with loved ones this year, but also bitter because it's not the same because some of them are gone and away. I am grateful for having able to experience Ramadan but also bitter because I let my emotions overcome when I should've done better. How good was I? Have I become a better person as Ramadhan ends? Will I have the privilege of having it again next year? Who am I going to experience it with? Will I be able to do it better?

Goodbye, Ramadan. You were amazing. I'm sorry I couldn't make use much of you. Hoping to meet you again.


A Ramadan Endnote

6/23/2017

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Photo by Lillian Soup. Taken from Unsplash.com
Photo by Lillian Soup. Taken from Unsplash.com




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Ramadan is a month of more. More time for Him. More time to pray. More time for family. More time for others. More time for the unfortunates. More time for ourselves. More time to remember things. More time to forget things. Quieter. More tolerance. More food. More blessings. More loving. More sharing.

Ramadan is a month of less. Less time to sleep. Less time to eat. Less concentration. Less awake. Less emotion. Less grudge. Less spending. Less extravagant. Less noise. Less intolerance.

Ramadan is a month of blessings. More focused working hours due to no break. Coming home early. The array of various snacks, some sold annually, here and there. Warm food for iftar. Small bites and water running down the throat after a day full of fasting. Incredible. Marvelous. Thankful.

Ramadan is a month of struggle. Of trying to wake up early enough. Bleary-eyed, uncoordinated, incoherent. Trying to stuff as many foods as possible. No coffee for a month. Dragging self to work two hours early. Struggling to stay awake once the clock hits noon. Still falling asleep. Too lazy to do everything. Trying to hold up the emotions. Good emotions. Bad emotions. No gossip for a month. No dirty thoughts. No cursing in the head. Nothing should be too much. Taking longer and deeper breaths. Hard. Little sufferings. Torture.

Ramadan is a month of respect. Respect ourselves who fast. Respect others who fast. Respect others who not fast. Respect the body. Respect the soul. By being mindful of what we eat, what we drink, what we say, what we see. Respect. Mindful. Because fasting is what we give and give. Never what we take and take.

Ramadan is a month of wake up call. To stay quiet and focused. Don't let anything ruin your fast. To constantly be thankful for everything. To constantly be grateful for everything. To take things slower. To do things more efficiently. To never let little inconvenience disturb you. Zen. Calm. To not eat too much more than what you can take. To eat mindfully. To eat healthily. To eat accordingly. To sleep early for even earlier suhur. Alert. Awake.

Ramadan is a month of regret. Regret for eating too much while another sister is in hunger. Regret for eating more than my tummy can take. The regret of throwing rotten leftover food left for the sake of "I'll eat it later!". Oh, who am I lying to? Regret for saying bad things that disturb my fasting. Regret because unable to withhold my emotions. The regret of awake for too long. Regret for falling asleep for too long. Shameful. Why, self?

Ramadan is a month of sharing. With the unfortunates. With the close ones. With the loved ones. Making sure no one lacks food albeit not much. Making sure no one sleeps in hunger. Making sure everyone who fast could break it conveniently. Share the food. Share the joy. Share the love. Share the blessings.

Ramadan is a month of getting closer. To God. To loved ones. To close ones. To the old friends. To new friends. To those people we rarely contact with. Gather together. Iftar together. Bonding over food and desserts. Endless chat and laughter after. Praying together. Catch up and share goals with each other. Togetherness. Gather. As if time never truly passed.

Ramadan is bittersweet. A month of mixed up feelings. I am grateful to be able to experience another Ramadan with loved ones this year, but also bitter because it's not the same because some of them are gone and away. I am grateful for having able to experience Ramadan but also bitter because I let my emotions overcome when I should've done better. How good was I? Have I become a better person as Ramadhan ends? Will I have the privilege of having it again next year? Who am I going to experience it with? Will I be able to do it better?

Goodbye, Ramadan. You were amazing. I'm sorry I couldn't make use much of you. Hoping to meet you again.



My watched list is slowly decreasing by each month. I can't say that it's a good thing, though. I always treat watching movies as a form of 'me' time and incredibly blissful while I'm doing it. The numbers somewhat indicated how many times I indulge myself and it's been deteriorating. Kind of frightening. In other note, the whole May has been packed with rewatch. A good kind of nostalgia. I only managed to watch Wonder Woman in cinema and skipped King Arthur because of a friend, a King Arthur enthusiast, really slammed it off which is rarely a good sign. There are not many good movies on May in the cinema anyway.


May 1st to May 31st. Total: 14 movies



  1. Baby’s Day Out (1994)
  2. X-Men: First Class (2011) - gaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy
  3. Maleficent (2014)
  4. Now You See Me (2013)
  5. X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014) - so rich. So profound. So full of hope.
  6. I Am Number Four (2011)
  7. Taken 2 (2012)
  8. RED (2010)
  9. RED 2 (2013)
  10. The Avengers (2012) - will I ever get tired watching this? NEVER.
  11. The Dark Knight Rises (2012)
  12. Taking Lives (2004)
  13. The Day After Tomorrow (2004)
  14. Wonder Woman* (2017) - Steve Trevor my chiLD *clutches kokoro*

Movies marked with an asterisk were watched in cinema. For a full list please go ahead to my Letterboxd. Also, for a real-time update, hop on to my diary where I (might) wrote slightly longer review on the movie. Here's my list for January, February, March, and April.

In TV department, May saw me watched Speechless, half of season 3 of The Flash and season 2 of Supergirl, Genius, K-drama Signal, and geeking over Superheroes Decoded. All of them are fun! Can't say the same while rewatching Cheese in the Trap though. On June I'm looking forward to Spider-Man Homecoming, of course. And some cinemas already played The Lost City of Z and The Whole Truth so I'll try to make some time for them. I'm also trying to start on The Handmaid's Tale, Legion, and American Gods.


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Anything you've watched or looking forward to watch?

Movies Watched, May 2017

6/19/2017


My watched list is slowly decreasing by each month. I can't say that it's a good thing, though. I always treat watching movies as a form of 'me' time and incredibly blissful while I'm doing it. The numbers somewhat indicated how many times I indulge myself and it's been deteriorating. Kind of frightening. In other note, the whole May has been packed with rewatch. A good kind of nostalgia. I only managed to watch Wonder Woman in cinema and skipped King Arthur because of a friend, a King Arthur enthusiast, really slammed it off which is rarely a good sign. There are not many good movies on May in the cinema anyway.


May 1st to May 31st. Total: 14 movies



  1. Baby’s Day Out (1994)
  2. X-Men: First Class (2011) - gaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy
  3. Maleficent (2014)
  4. Now You See Me (2013)
  5. X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014) - so rich. So profound. So full of hope.
  6. I Am Number Four (2011)
  7. Taken 2 (2012)
  8. RED (2010)
  9. RED 2 (2013)
  10. The Avengers (2012) - will I ever get tired watching this? NEVER.
  11. The Dark Knight Rises (2012)
  12. Taking Lives (2004)
  13. The Day After Tomorrow (2004)
  14. Wonder Woman* (2017) - Steve Trevor my chiLD *clutches kokoro*

Movies marked with an asterisk were watched in cinema. For a full list please go ahead to my Letterboxd. Also, for a real-time update, hop on to my diary where I (might) wrote slightly longer review on the movie. Here's my list for January, February, March, and April.

In TV department, May saw me watched Speechless, half of season 3 of The Flash and season 2 of Supergirl, Genius, K-drama Signal, and geeking over Superheroes Decoded. All of them are fun! Can't say the same while rewatching Cheese in the Trap though. On June I'm looking forward to Spider-Man Homecoming, of course. And some cinemas already played The Lost City of Z and The Whole Truth so I'll try to make some time for them. I'm also trying to start on The Handmaid's Tale, Legion, and American Gods.


/


Anything you've watched or looking forward to watch?






May 13-13th, 2017. Ennichisai Little Tokyo in Blok M

Familiar places. Familiar faces. Familiar tenants. Familiar language. The always happy and enthusiastic crowd. The smell of takoyaki and okonomiyaki in the air. Shouts of "Come in!". Broken Indonesian language. Broken Japanese language. Endless laughs and cheers. Japanese people. Ojisan in haori. Colorful yukata. Ever so shiny omikoshi. Music. Loud music. Traditional music. Modern music. Cover songs. Cosplays. Family cosplay. Girls in pigtail and ponytail. Discounted goods. The smell of grilled squid/ikayaki. The first bite of ikayaki. Tenderness and juiciness of ikayaki. Rows and rows of merchandises. The tenants' mascots turned celebrities. The couple who asked me to take a photo of them together under the lantern in golden hour. The photo was lovely. Golden hour. Orange sky. Hesitation and confusion over dinner. Yummy and too filling karaage made by a very lovely aunt. Feeling so bloated and unable to move afterward. The night filled with neon lights. The endless wave of people. Familiar scene.

Also, discovering what is HDR for. Damn.

Ennichisai Little Tokyo 2017

6/09/2017







May 13-13th, 2017. Ennichisai Little Tokyo in Blok M

Familiar places. Familiar faces. Familiar tenants. Familiar language. The always happy and enthusiastic crowd. The smell of takoyaki and okonomiyaki in the air. Shouts of "Come in!". Broken Indonesian language. Broken Japanese language. Endless laughs and cheers. Japanese people. Ojisan in haori. Colorful yukata. Ever so shiny omikoshi. Music. Loud music. Traditional music. Modern music. Cover songs. Cosplays. Family cosplay. Girls in pigtail and ponytail. Discounted goods. The smell of grilled squid/ikayaki. The first bite of ikayaki. Tenderness and juiciness of ikayaki. Rows and rows of merchandises. The tenants' mascots turned celebrities. The couple who asked me to take a photo of them together under the lantern in golden hour. The photo was lovely. Golden hour. Orange sky. Hesitation and confusion over dinner. Yummy and too filling karaage made by a very lovely aunt. Feeling so bloated and unable to move afterward. The night filled with neon lights. The endless wave of people. Familiar scene.

Also, discovering what is HDR for. Damn.


I watched Wonder Woman alone last Wednesday. A movie I've been so hyped for since knowing the last Chris remains ™ was taken by DC (so that Marvel doesn't have the complete set). Yes, I came for Chris Pine. But I'm not gonna lie. Gal Gadot's portrayal of Diana Prince a.k.a Wonder Woman on Batman v Superman last year was also the factor that dragged me to the cinema.

Seeing Gadot brought Diana to life in BvS was a major fangirl moment. Not gonna lie. She's strong, with a goddess-like stature and fights like a warrior. Saying she hard-carried BvS was also pretty apt to state. Somewhat a saving grace. I came out after feeling good and positive about the upcoming Wonder Woman movie.

It's proven right a year after.

But also there's this conflicted feeling. Hesitation, some sort, over Gadot.

Gadot is Israeli. An Israeli soldier before her Hollywood days. In her Facebook back in 2014, she posted support over Israelian military who fought over Hamas, Palestine. I'm not going to delve deeper on the subject of Palestine vs Israel because I believe you have access to Google. Also, Lebanon has banned any screening of Wonder Woman (FYI Gadot served in 2006 and during her period IDF killed 1100 Lebanese and injured 4400). This makes her a Zionist.

I'm not highly religious nor political person. But I'm not gonna lie that this issue shocked me a bit. I'm a woman, Muslim, and a moviegoer at that. I've turned a blind eye over so many things people in this industry have done but also supported the other lot (don't get me started on Casey Affleck controversy and how on earth Brie Larson should hand him the award). And this one issue also felt close because how come feminists chose to overlook this issue and coming over her shaved armpits instead? Is it because as long as she brought the character to justice? Do they realize by still consuming her works then there will be studios who are willing to overlook her beliefs as long as she makes money?

To quote Affinity:

How can you praise the new Wonder Woman movie when she is being played by someone who condones the horrible crimes committed by Israel for years? How can the new Wonder Woman be someone who dedicated a portion of her life to serving in that military, which goes against the character’s values and beliefs?

Isn't that the truth?

Are we being permissive because of those actors, those artists excelled in their field so that their belief shouldn't affect us from enjoying their works? The actor who abused a woman, the artist who have killed another man, the singer with tons of controversies, to other people who supported wrong beliefs yet still appear here and there just because there's a demand.

This is a question of integrity for some. Others chose to turn a blind eye. I am aware of my decision to watch Wonder Woman would get a side eye from some people. Currently, my feminist side is screaming, also the moviegoer in me is confused as hell. This post is all over the place and I'm aware of that. On the core, I'm still conflicted but I also know I have integrity, there are beliefs I fought and fight over, and I should've planted myself harder.

In short, a dilemma.



P. S. This post is nowhere made to discourage you from watching and I'm simply posting because I knew I'm not alone in this internal struggle. I'm open to disagreements and different perspective, not just on Gal Gadot but entertainers in general.

Should We Draw a Line Between Artist and Personal Controversy?

6/02/2017



I watched Wonder Woman alone last Wednesday. A movie I've been so hyped for since knowing the last Chris remains ™ was taken by DC (so that Marvel doesn't have the complete set). Yes, I came for Chris Pine. But I'm not gonna lie. Gal Gadot's portrayal of Diana Prince a.k.a Wonder Woman on Batman v Superman last year was also the factor that dragged me to the cinema.

Seeing Gadot brought Diana to life in BvS was a major fangirl moment. Not gonna lie. She's strong, with a goddess-like stature and fights like a warrior. Saying she hard-carried BvS was also pretty apt to state. Somewhat a saving grace. I came out after feeling good and positive about the upcoming Wonder Woman movie.

It's proven right a year after.

But also there's this conflicted feeling. Hesitation, some sort, over Gadot.

Gadot is Israeli. An Israeli soldier before her Hollywood days. In her Facebook back in 2014, she posted support over Israelian military who fought over Hamas, Palestine. I'm not going to delve deeper on the subject of Palestine vs Israel because I believe you have access to Google. Also, Lebanon has banned any screening of Wonder Woman (FYI Gadot served in 2006 and during her period IDF killed 1100 Lebanese and injured 4400). This makes her a Zionist.

I'm not highly religious nor political person. But I'm not gonna lie that this issue shocked me a bit. I'm a woman, Muslim, and a moviegoer at that. I've turned a blind eye over so many things people in this industry have done but also supported the other lot (don't get me started on Casey Affleck controversy and how on earth Brie Larson should hand him the award). And this one issue also felt close because how come feminists chose to overlook this issue and coming over her shaved armpits instead? Is it because as long as she brought the character to justice? Do they realize by still consuming her works then there will be studios who are willing to overlook her beliefs as long as she makes money?

To quote Affinity:

How can you praise the new Wonder Woman movie when she is being played by someone who condones the horrible crimes committed by Israel for years? How can the new Wonder Woman be someone who dedicated a portion of her life to serving in that military, which goes against the character’s values and beliefs?

Isn't that the truth?

Are we being permissive because of those actors, those artists excelled in their field so that their belief shouldn't affect us from enjoying their works? The actor who abused a woman, the artist who have killed another man, the singer with tons of controversies, to other people who supported wrong beliefs yet still appear here and there just because there's a demand.

This is a question of integrity for some. Others chose to turn a blind eye. I am aware of my decision to watch Wonder Woman would get a side eye from some people. Currently, my feminist side is screaming, also the moviegoer in me is confused as hell. This post is all over the place and I'm aware of that. On the core, I'm still conflicted but I also know I have integrity, there are beliefs I fought and fight over, and I should've planted myself harder.

In short, a dilemma.



P. S. This post is nowhere made to discourage you from watching and I'm simply posting because I knew I'm not alone in this internal struggle. I'm open to disagreements and different perspective, not just on Gal Gadot but entertainers in general.
A Wordsmith.